These Women Kick Butt and So Can You

Who inspires you to lead a bolder life? Photo by Kalen Emsley.

By Regina Winkle-Bryan

“What you focus on, you create more of,” says author and general queen of badassery Jen Sincero. I want to manifest more bold, innovative people and experiences in my life, and if you’re reading this, I bet you do, too.

I founded my company because I aim to help women take brave leaps in their lives using travel as the catalyst. But I also created Bold Spirit because I wanted to push myself to be even gutsier, to follow my own dreams.

Bold begets bold.

If Sincero is right, and what you focus on multiplies, then focusing on catastrophes, real or imagined, brings more of them into your life, whether in the literal sense or in the form of acute anxiety. However, if you focus on acts of courage and real people who are transforming their lives, you attract energy that lifts you up. That’s where the magic happens.

What you focus on you create more of. Focus on your big dreams and avoid negative self-talk. Photograph by Léa B.

The catch is that it’s hard to imagine something you’ve never had.

How can you really picture yourself as a successful designer with her own skort line when you don’t know anyone who has created that sort of life for herself? It’s almost impossible to believe that you could hike the entirety of the Camino de Santiago in Spain if you have no examples of women in your age range who have done it. Yet, people of all ages and backgrounds walk the Camino each year. Ask them how they ended up there, and many will say that they had a friend who did it or saw a movie about it.

My point is that you need an example.

You need to actively seek out mentors and inspiration. You must focus on people and organizations that show you what’s possible and help move you toward the Big Dream, whatever that aspiration is for you.

Maybe you’re dreaming of hiking El Camino de Santiago.

*Maybe you want to take a long-overdue sabbatical but worry about ruffling feathers.

*Maybe you want to start a side hustle selling your gorgeous essential oils.

*Maybe you want to get in shape and be able to do splits.

*Maybe you want to move to Hawaii because you’re done with the cold, but you know your adult children will be pissed (how could you leave them? You’re childcare!).

*Or maybe, like me, you want to venture out and start your own business.

It doesn’t matter what your dream is. It matters that you have examples of others like you who are pursuing their goals and living audaciously.

Maybe you’ve always wanted to live in Hawaii but have never felt “allowed” to make the move. Photograph by Braden Jarvis.

Could this be a conversation? Here’s what I imagine: I share a selection of resources focusing on people who light me up. Then, you do the same. We share tips. We spread the inspiration and joy so that all of us get a boost.

I’ll start with Jenna Kutcher because I heard about her from my former esthetician. Before I moved to Seattle, I frequented Serendipity Spa, and during my sessions, I had long conversations with the owner, Katie Lytle. During one such sesh, she told me about Kutcher’s Goal Digger podcast, and I’ve been a listener ever since.

Goal Digger is for those of you who want to start your own business, whether that be online or a brick-and-mortar shop. Or at least that’s the premise at first glance—there’s more to it. The host also shares about her miscarriages and fertility journey, something many people struggle with, but few openly talk about. Body image and body positivity—things most women think about a lot—are also recurring topics on her podcast.

**Note about Jenna Kutcher (6/4/2020): I am no longer following Goal Digger or Jenna after this interaction with Toi Smith came to my attention.

Find some inspiration listening to the Goal Digger podcast with Jenna Kutcher. Photograph by CoWomen.

I love an innovative brand with a great product made for women, so Knix immediately caught my attention when it came through my Instagram feed. I think I may have seen something about Knix via The Birds Papaya, which is another great spot to go for insightful commentary about body positivity, especially the postpartum body. Can a belly that carried three babies be beautiful? The writer, Sarah Nicole Landry, gets into that.

But back to Knix. Joanna Griffiths learned about the reality women face after childbirth and then created a cute line of leakproof underwear and comfortable bras. Leakproof underwear? Who wants to talk about that? But don’t click away yet! The conversation may still be taboo for some, but the need is great, because Griffiths’ company is one of the fastest growing in Canada at the moment.

Turns out, underwear can be inspirational. Photograph by Leighann Blackwood.

I have some Knix products and I am a fan, but what got me interested in the company initially was the postpartum project Griffiths collaborated on called Life After Birth, which highlighted the experiences of 250 women who had just had babies. Some of these women include Amy Schumer, Jemima Kirke, Jillian Harris, and Ricki Lake.

I have not had children, but the photos from this project captured my attention because a spotlight was shone on an unglamorous part of motherhood that is usually kept under wraps. The idea that women did not need to immediately “bounce back” after childbirth was refreshing and innovative.

More recently, Griffiths and the Knix crew released a line of bras and undies for women over 50. They launched with this video, which you should definitely check out. After all, what’s wrong with being confident? Not a damn thing.

The author, Jen Sincero, and one of her Badass books. Photo credit https://jensincero.com/

Speaking of inspiring women over 50, have you been reading Jen Sincero? She is an author who, until her 40s, was living in a remodeled garage and “employing duct tape, instead of professionals, to repair things like leaking pipes, busted shoe straps, and fractured bones.” In other words, she was super broke. Now she’s the best-selling author of the You Are a Badass series and is definitely not using duct tape for shoe repair.

I saw Sincero speak a few years ago at Powell’s Books in Portland and have followed her on social media and bought her subsequent books ever since. If her story does not encourage you, her books will. I recommend You Are a Badass at Making Money, published in 2018.

Sincero is a strong proponent of filling your life with people who show you what you can become if you stay the course and channel your inner lionhearted goddess. “Surround yourself with people who have unwavering faith in themselves, in you, and in our abundant Universe and it will help you take the giant leaps you need to take,” she says.

Do the people you surround yourself with inspire you and lift you up? Or do they rain on your parade? Photograph by Priscilla Du Preez.

Are the people in your life lifting you up and supporting your aspirations, or are they holding you back? Who are the women you admire and desire to be more like? Get those women in your social media feeds, in the books on your nightstands, and coming at you through your earbuds via motivating podcasts.

Remember, what you focus on, you create more of. So, focusing on impassioned women who are kicking serious booty in the world brings that vibration your way ASAP. If nothing else, you’ll be entertained.

Now it’s your turn. Who gets you excited? What brands, books, and shows are lighting you up on the daily? I can’t wait to read your recommendations.